The following is an article about my children’s home from the magazine, “The Yonsei Annals.” It is long, but if you have any interest in orphanages/children’s home in Korea, please read through it. You’ll be able to understand a bit more of some of the struggles these kids face. God bless!
Minority Report – Same Person, Different Treatment
A look in the lives of boyookwon people
by Chung Chee-Hae
A beautiful park was built next to an orphanage. It seemed as if our society was now starting to open up toward social minorities – or was that really the case? This orphanage was originally located in the middle of a city, but people in the city started to complain about the location of this orphanage the way typical NIMBY (Not In My Back Yard) activists do. For years, there was a long fight between the people of the city and the orphanage, and in the end, it was decided that the orphanage move to the outskirts of the city. Unfortunately, the new neighbors of the orphanage also began to complain. The solution this time was the build a park in order to separate the orphanage from the rest of the neighborhood. It was a beautiful park, perhaps, but one that acted as an invisible wall to keep unwelcome guests out.
In their youth
The Korean term for orphanage is boyookwon, an organization where children under the age of 18 without parents live. The majority of the children at boyookwons are kids who have parents but cannot live with them for various reasons. “After the IMF (International Monetary Fund) crisis, the number of children who parents left them at boyookwons for financial or other private reasons increased very significantly. For example, unlike in the past, in the Geon Christian Children’s Home, among 80 children, only about eight of them do not have any family at all,” says Kim Hye-Sook, a director at the home. As soon as they reach the age of 18, they have to leave the place and live on their own. This is, however, not a very proper time for them to leave since most of them are not yet grownups but high school students who still need help from adults.
In fact, the educational problem is one of the most serious matters that boyookwon people face. Even though many of these students have a very strong desire to learn, not many of them decide to go to college. Instead, they try to acquire as many qualification certificates as they can in order to get jobs after graduating from high school. “We try to provide a variety of education programs, requesting support from community groups, in order to enable our children to receive better educational programs. These efforts, however, are not enough to satisfy the students’ desire for learning,” claims Kim. There is not much support from the government nor many donations from individual supporters. You may think boyookwon people receive a poor education but the very cause of this is lack of support from society to satisfy their eagerness to learn.
After becoming adults
The people from boyookwons have many different kinds of difficulties. One of the major problems is that they have trouble building trust in relationships with other people. Because of this, when they become adults, if somebody shows some concern for them, they give their trust to easily. They do not really know why other people try to get close to them and end up thinking that these people have some affection for them. This can be a problem because many people are interested in manipulating or cheating them. “A person who is tricked by someone else deceives another close boyookwon friend since the friend trusts him or her entirely. I have gone through this situation many times. At first, I abhorred friends who betrayed me because they went off with my money. But then, I realized that they must have been terribly tired of their lives to trick a close person like me and that distrust against society itself made them act that way,” says Ju Dong-Min, a social worker who grew up at the very boyookwon where he now works.
Also, there are big disadvantages when boyookwon individuals try to get jobs. For instance, even in cases where people from boyookwons have graduated from the same college as people who have grown up with their parents, lots of companies do not hire boyookwon people merely because they are from boyookwons. Boyookwon people feel that the firms simply conclude that since they did not have parents to rear them, they would have difficulties adapting to the hierarchical atmosphere of organizations. “Because of this kind of misconception, no matter how talented we are, we cannot get good jobs in large enterprises. On the other hand, employers at construction sites prefer to hire us because they think they can exploit us as we do not have anybody to support us. So, quite often, we end up engaging in physically demanding jobs,” claims Ju.
Furthermore, people have the prejudice that boyookwon people have not gained a proper moral education. It has a tremendous effect when people from boyookwons try to get married. In many cases, no matter how much the consenting parties in a marriage love each other, the marriage does not always end in success because the parents object. “The reason for the parents’ objection is almost always the same. They think that those who have spent their youth at boyookwons would be different from them in a negative way. They simply consider a boyookwon to be a place where children are brought up to become insolent adults,” asserts Ju. However, there are a number of teachers at each boyookwon who help the children receive proper moral education like children who live with their parents. “My sister, my brother, and I grew up with orphans because my mom and dad ran a boyookwon. People tend to think that boyookwon children have not received a proper education, but I know through my experience that they are not different from us at all. In fact, they are not as rude to others as people usually think,” says Yi Tae-won, a musical actress who performed in The Last Empress.
Ways to create changes
Still our society categorizes the people who lived in boyookwons into a completely different class. These boyookwon people are, however, just the same as people who grew up with their parents. Though they were not fortunate enough to live under their parents’ care, they are socialized enough to co-work and live with other people. “They are just like us. It would be much better for people to look at them without any prejudice,” says Yi. The best way to help boyookwon people live happily within our society would be for others to change their preconceptions, but it would take a long time. So people like Ju propose an alternative. “Since people are strongly influenced by the media, it is important to make sure the media conveys accurate images of boyookwon people. In face, the media tends to portray people from boyookwons as social outcasts who commit criminative acts after becoming adults. I think this is one of the biggest influences that trigger people to think that those who spent their childhood at boyookwons are not proper people to associate with,” asserts Ju.
Maybe it is the general atmosphere of our society that has caused the people from boyookwons to feel isolated even after they become adults. A simple change of perspective will enable them to live happy lives with other people. If this change seems too sudden, then just change the distorted view of the media to a more realistic stance that can show the actual image of those who spent their childhood at boyookwons. This very small change can help them live ordinary lives just like people with both parents. –
– My thoughts… these kids are different in that they have a lot of different scars inside, none of these scars are their own fault though… true healing won’t come from the media portraying them right or people giving them a fair shot at a job, true healing will come through prayer and God’s love being poured out. You can have all the luxuries of the world, but if you have no love or purpose, your life has no worth. With that said, please pray for our high school graduates (Doo Bong, Keun Oh, Yong Soo, and Yoo Ree… picture in entry below) who are having to leave this week, that they may enter into a true relationship with God and understand His peace, His love, and His purpose for each of them. Pray God may protect them. Thank you, God bless!
Chris Tomlin with David Crowder – This Is Our God
