June 4, 2012

• The Kids (and Adults) Who Remain Children at Heart

  Everyday I am at the home my kids will ask me to play with them after dinner.  They absolutely love it when I chase them all around the playground and try and catch them and tickle them. 

  Today I told the kids I would come out and play with them after doing some work in the office.  While working in there we suddenly heard a bunch of the kids screaming out, “J–M!!!”  “J–M!!!”  “J–M!!!”  All the office workers looked at me wondering what was going on and I just shook my head and said, “I’m sorry.”  Soon some of the kids came in and asked again how long it would be and I said just a few more minutes.  And sure enough, just a few minutes later we heard them altogether shouting out my name again.  The manager asked me, “What are you going to do with them?”  I smiled sheepishly and said, “Chase them around… I’m 30 years old and I’m still playing this way.”  They all laughed.

  What is somewhat surprising is that it isn’t just the kindergarten and young elementary school kids who love it when I chase them, catch them, and tickle them.  Almost all the boys who are middle school and even high school enjoy it too.  They usually won’t run around with the little kids, but if I do suddenly go after them they will laugh a lot and enjoy the attention.  Some of the middle school girls at the home also tend to still act childish and silly and enjoy the attention despite being at ages where they should have grown out of it at least a year or two earlier.  They are still little children at heart around mother/father figures who are playful with them. 

  While serving as the healing and deliverance pastors at our church and counseling many different people, my wife and I have noticed how a number of people who were sexually abused as children have different childlike quirks to them.  Our thought was that because a large part of their childhood was robbed from them that it was still coming out despite them being adults.  But what we are realizing is that for people who didn’t have fathers or didn’t receive positive attention from their parents when they were young, they are often still starving for that parental attention even when they are adults.  I know different adult men who light up just like my kids when I give them a really big smile, a high five, and enthusiastic encouragement.  Most adults would feel awkward if they had to receive such actions from me, but for such people like my kids those actions are crucial for them.

  I’ve noticed that more and more Korean kids are similar to my kids at the children’s home.  They are also starving for positive attention and safe touch and affection.  Kids in Korea have to study almost all the time and their parents are rarely around.  I asked one Korean middle school boy about his dad (who is a pastor) and he said, “I don’t know him that well.  He is always busy with work and ministry.”  It’s sad how big the lack is of positive attention from parents among the younger generation. 

  One of my favorite memories from serving over 6 and a half years at the children’s home was seeing one of the oldest girls gather a bunch of the kids and toddlers in a circle and dance and skip around in a circle while happily singing.  All the kids were so happy and were so free!  I’m looking forward to seeing more and more of these kids find this freedom in the Lord and be able to dance and sing freely in His Presence, receiving all the needed, safe, positive attention that they had missed in their youth.  Come, Lord!

  God bless!

  • 11:06 am
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