August 12, 2012

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  Stages of Love

  The book Song of Songs is interesting because it can be interpreted in three ways…

  1.  Spiritually as a picture of God’s love for the church (see IHOP’s Mike Bickle)

  2.  Emotionally as a story of romance between two lovers with guidance for how to care for one another (see Denton Bible Church’s Tommy Nelson)

  3.  Physically as clear depictions of the sexual love life between two lovers

  And in the same way, when we experience love for someone we should feel it for them on all three levels:  spiritually, emotionally, and physically… and in that specific order. 

  The physical attraction, just like the act of sex, has a limit of time to it.  And, just like sex, it tends to be what catches peoples’ attention the most, even though it shouldn’t.  Once desires are met for this attraction, it tends to die quickly unless it has the other two attractions as its foundation.  Physical beauty is fleeting. 

  The emotional attraction, just like dating, also has a limit to it but is longer and goes through different stages.  Lovers need to connect emotionally much more than they need to connect physically.  Without the emotional connection their physical love is just a spark that dies quickly.  The emotional connection establishes a friendship that allows two peoples’ souls to connect more and more deeply.  Just like dating/getting to know someone is an important step toward marriage, so is emotional connection important to the foundation of a marriage.  But it still isn’t the most important.

  The spiritual attraction, just like marriage, is an eternal fire that is the most important of the three.  Worship to the Lord is eternal and only grows stronger with each day.  It’s a commitment of a lifetime, and fosters a joy and a security that nothing else can rival.  If there is a spiritual attraction of someone else (respect and admiration for another person’s love for God), the emotional and especially the physical aspects of that person will shine much more brightly.  Because each lover already has made an eternal commitment to God, their commitment to one another is so much stronger.  Their dreams are able to combine and be fully achieved because they are truly one in the Lord and are led by Him alone.  The emotional attraction might help form a solid connection, but the spiritual attraction is the glue that holds them together.

  Emotional and physical attraction are important, but usually if a person has a strong spiritual attraction to someone their need for the others lessen, and if their emotional attaction is strong as well, the physical attraction will be strong regardless of however society labels the person.  When someone is seen spiritually, they glow and even the most homely of people are seen as far more beautiful than any model or celebrity.  They’re seen in the same way God sees them… made in His beautiful image and fashioned by His amazing hands.

  Interestingly, the stronger the attraction is physically usually the more blind the person is to the deficiences of the other two areas.  The attraction should always start spiritually, and then emotionally, and then physically.  Without respect and honor (spiritual attraction) the relationship is typically doomed.  Friendships (emotional connection) may last a lifetime, but friends don’t usually live with each other or make every decision together for the rest of their lives.  A deeper commitment and a deeper maturity is needed for that. 

  Just some reflections after briefly teaching on Song of Songs during Bible study today.  God bless!  =)

  • 9:16 am
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